Killer Clown Movie Marathon

As I said in a previous post, I am not-so-patiently waiting for the Halloween season to officially begin.  To tide myself over, I've been watching a LOT of horror movies, which led to a mini marathon dedicated to KILLER CLOWNS!  If you suffer from coulrophobia, you might want to stay away from these three picks.  None of these movies are really what I would call GOOD, but I enjoyed watching them.  If you're not afraid of spoilers, check below to see a brief summary and where you can find these little gems.

SPOILER ALERT!!

1. Clown (2014)---When the clown hired for Kent's son's birthday party cancels, the family momentarily panics.  Luckily, Kent, a real estate agent, is at one of his recently foreclosed properties when his wife calls with the news.  He just happens to find a clown costume in an old trunk, puts it on, and saves the party.  But, when the costume refuses to come off, Kent and his wife get stuck in a race to save his life...and his humanity.  Because, as you'll find out, the suit isn't a costume at all!  As of right now, Clown is available on Netflix streaming, so definitely check it out if you're a subscriber.  While the movie wasn't spectacular...it was interesting.  The story behind the movie is pretty cool---a couple of guys made a fake movie trailer, slapped Eli Roth's name on it as a joke, and put it up on YouTube.  Eventually, Eli Roth saw the trailer, liked it, and reached out to the guys to actually get the movie made!  It is a little gory, and if you're flat-out adverse to children being killed in horror flicks, you might want to stay away from this one.  However, its worth the watch if you just want something a little non-traditional to watch.  I'm NOT a fan of gore, but I do love when movies create a mythology and/or back story to explain the monster, and Clown does this very well.

2. Stitches (2012)---Since I watched Clown, Netflix suggested that I give Stitches a shot...and I'm glad I took the suggestion.  This is another film that is nowhere near an award-winning cinema experience, but it was a fun ride.  When the world's crassest clown performs at a birthday party for the world's brattiest, most foul-mouthed kids in the world, things end poorly.  The clown ends up dead, and the kids traumatized.  Flash-forward to six years later.  The kids, now teens, decide to throw a party for the previous birthday boy, which brings back the spirit of the clown.  Stitches, now risen from the grave, goes on a killing spree to take out each kid who was at the original party.  This is another movie where there's an interesting smattering of mythology involved to explain (and defeat) the monster. Again, not the world's greatest film, but it was pretty darn funny in places.  It was definitely...creative.

3. Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988)---I wrapped up my mini marathon with a classic. When I was about 8 or 9, this movie came on HBO, I believe.  I thought it was the greatest thing I had ever seen at the time. I think a big part of it was that I felt like I was sneaking around, watching a 'grown up' film and not even being scared.  Re-watching it as an adult, however, well, lol.  It's still a really fun, cheesy movie to watch, with one of the greatest title songs in film history.  It all starts when a mysterious 'asteroid' crashes to earth.  When a young couple (and previously, an old man and his dog) go looking for it, they don't find an asteroid.  Instead, they find a circus tent filled with killer klowns from outer space, of course.  The clowns invade the town, turning the citizens into cotton candy pods and generally pissing off a grumpy veteran cop. Hilarity ensues, until the heroes save the girl, stab the head clown in the nose, and blow up the circus tent spaceship.  I found this one on Hulu, and recommend it if you need a good, 80s cheese-fest.

Halloween Safety 1977/1985

If changing your costume from black to white, and adding obnoxious amounts of red, reflective tape doesn't keep you safe from getting hit by a car on Halloween night, make sure you put your name and address on your treat bag so they can identify your body. Photo Source

Growing up, I was expressly forbidden to wear a mask at Halloween.  Not only did my mom swear that my vision would be impaired, she was also convinced that I wouldn't be able to breathe.  When my nephew was old enough to start picking out his own Halloween costumes, she reluctantly let him have masks....but not before she totally ruined them by enlarging the eye and nose holes to the point where there was no point in even wearing a mask.

So, when I found this Halloween safety film from 1977, I had to laugh.  I'm pretty sure that my mom was required to watch this as a young mother.  I can totally empathize with the little girl whose costume is completely changed to make it safer. 

This delightful little film was released by Centron Educational Films and is dated 1977.  It was lovingly brought to the internet thanks to a blogger named Jason Willis. Willis, then seven years old, makes a brief appearance in the film!  According to his blog, Willis was cast from his 2nd grade costume parade at school, thanks to his awesome Creature From the Black Lagoon costume. He can be seen at around the 5:26 mark in the film.  He's the kid putting in the wax teeth.

If the video won't play on the screen, here's the YouTube Link.

But...there's more!

I just recently found out that with the help of Coronet Films, they made a second edition!  The 1985 follow-up features an animated talking pumpkin walking you through various safety tips, including costuming, pumpkin carving, trick-or-treating and more. I thought it was funny that the 1977 film came out two years after my sister was born, while the 1985 version came out when I was two years old!  After watching both, I'm now thoroughly convinced my mom got her own Halloween safety tips from these videos! In fact, I could swear that I've heard her quote them, verbatim.

This version is a little more...funky...opening with deadly Halloween masks flying around a black screen while upbeat music plays.  The cast is also a little more diverse, and at the end, the pumpkin is joined by a cute, spooky lil' cartoon ghost. However, its still a major buzz kill, and I can only guess how many kids' Halloween memories were tainted by overzealous, safety-obsessed parents who were forced to watch this film. I-Mockery does a hilarious write-up on the original film, so definitely go check it out after watching.

Have a happy and safe Halloween!

YouTube Direct Link

Halloween in My Heart

WHY is it not Autumn yet?!?  It is SO hot here in the tri-state, and I am absolutely over summer.  I am ready for Halloween.  It's frustrating....the stores in my area are slowly starting to put out SOME Halloween merchandise, but not enough to really be worth my time and/or cash.  So, to get my spooky fix, I've been binge watching horror films and starting a few little Halloween crafty things.

What about you?  Are you ready for Halloween?

Mrs. and Mr. Pumpkin Head

It's Mrs. and Mr. Pumpkin Head...and what a dashing pair they make!

I absolutely love this spooky Jack-o-Lantern couple!  I found this image on Halloween Lovers Facebook page, but I'm not sure who the original artist is...it looks like its signed lr or b  with a date of 2010.  Please let me know if you recognize these images, so I can credit and link the artist.